My grandbaby is better than your Grandbaby...mine is better than yours!

This same picture is posted on Sean's site...but I stole it and want to share it with all of you...isnt she beautiful!!!

Kirsten's Favorite Sport goes on...

Kirsten played her first tournament of the new season this weekend. They had a very wet and messy Friday night. We watched them play in the rain. Kirsten was playing third base and ended up landing in a huge puddle, and still nearly got the out. She is an awesome thirdbaseman. On Saturday Morning she pitched the first game and there was not one girl that walked or earned a run...she did a great job. She also had the rare treat of having a slumber partym which she has never had before in her life. I am not big on sleep overs with all the problems that have been associated with that activity, but with all the rain it meant snow in Cedar City so we invited all of her team mates from Cedar to come to our house and spend the night. They had a great time playing wii and cards...and eating pop corn...I had uniforms and cleats from one end of the house to the other....it was great fun...we look forward to the tournament in April...Keep you all posted on where and when she will be playing again. Kirsten asked me last week if she can get a athletic scholarship and an academic scholarship...I told her she could..that she needed to set a goal to be sure she had an academic scholarship, and pick the team she wanted to play for...and learn about their athletic programs...

Kirsten is a smart girl with great goals...

Time Again for Christian's Favorite Sport!

Christian absolutely loves basketball and is looking forward to playing with his new border league team. He is very loyal to Pineview and I think he is part black cat...he is fun to watch...he has a goal to play college basketball... but to quote a smart young man, he said..."I am going to school on my brain, mom. " He is a perfect student and dedicated athlete. He is also hoping to finish his Eagle Scout Project, putting in a basketball court for the kindergarden students at Sandstone...gotta call the principal Christian :)

Border League

What an exciting time for us...

Both Christian and Kirsten made their respective basketball teams...Marci's Younger sister, and Kirsten's good friend also made the team and will be playing with KiKi as well.

They really love basketball...so stay tuned for some fun photos of tense moments...

Congratulations to the two of you...and Miss Melissa too. I wasnt sure KiKi would make any team...or get to play in her tournament...she had a huge gash in her knee that required stitches...but she was able to do it all.

Sean can take credit for their basketball skills...he has been working with them since they were wee little tikes...

Sean was able to coach Christian's team last year in city league...what a special fun time...short lived but long remembered.

Thought for today

“You must be strong now. You must never give up. And when people make you cry and you are afraid of the dark, don't forget the light is always there.”

Study for today

10 ¶ Who can find a avirtuous bwoman? for her price is far above rubies.

11 The heart of her husband doth safely atrust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.

12 She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

13 She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her ahands.

14 She is like the merchants’ ships; she bringeth her food from afar.

15 She ariseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens.

16 She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.

17 She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms.

18 She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.

19 She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the adistaff.

20 She stretcheth out her hand to the apoor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.

21 She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet.

22 She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her aclothing is silk and purple.

23 Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land.

24 She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant.

25 Strength and honour are her aclothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come.

26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of akindness.

27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of aidleness.

28 Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.

29 Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all.

30 Favour is deceitful, and abeauty is vain: but a woman that bfeareth the Lord, she shall be praised.

31 Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.

Thought for today

"Have patience with all things, but chiefly have patience with yourself. Do not lose courage in considering your own imperfections, but instantly set about remedying them - every day begin the task anew."-Saint Francis de Sales

Today's thought

“Knowing trees, I understand the meaning of patience. Knowing grass, I can appreciate persistence.”
—Hal Borland

Quote for the day

“The greatest power is often simple patience.”
—E. Joseph Cossman (b. 1918), author

When it gets dark and wet you need to seek warmth and light

I have been having the most stormy time of late...I think I am stunbling and knocking people down in the process...I have come to a point in my life, my mission, my journey where I can not seem to let things roll off...I have been using the same coping method for years...my foolproof answer to a more positive attitude... When someone hurts your feelings or offends you...make up a story that makes what they did valid...like a neighbor is rude to me...I say to myself...oh she has had a terrible fight with her husband and is just venting...whether I am right or wrong I am happy...it has been my tool for as long back as I can remember...it worked.

In the past year...maybe a bit longer...time moves so strangely when measuring emotional and spiritual changes I am not sure when it started...it was so slow and subtle...but here I am...and I can still make up a story...but I dont want to do nothing and say nothing anymore...I want to confront...I want to tell people how I feel...I want to say HEY...that hurts...and I find that this new approach is not nearly as well received as the old method, and I am not really feeling happy or light with it myself...I want to always just tell a story. I know why I shouldnt...I know that I have to be more honest with people...even at the risk of them being angry, or hurt. I know I have to master doing this with the tender mercy of my Savior...and that is the part that is so hard.

It presses at me...not to be rude...it is not like that...it is to tell the truth...tell the truth about feelings expectations, voice my needs...things I was taught as a child were selfish and wrong...things I pray I have not inadvertantly taught my own children.

I pray about answers and have been working on this...and the road here is steep rocky, and the weather blustery ...and the visibility poor...I liked the other road better, slope easy, warm just a familiar easy trot...

I wonder now if I have gotten off course or if this is the path, however challenging, that will ultimately lead me to that elusive joy promised by my Father.

It is through the Savior, Christ himself, that we get through the bad weather...I am greatful for the warmth and light he brings me.

I am grateful for my children, and grandchildren who love me in spite of my shortcomings...and my friends who support and bouy me up when I need to figure out a problem temporal and most importantly spiritual...I am grateful for my job, where I am granted the rare privlege of still being a mom as I work...I go to teacher conferences, school plays, field trips and games. I am available all day to my family and can get tasks taken care of and chores done during my work time. I think working is hard...and even feel it a sin after some sacrament meetings:), but I know how I got this job, I know God's hand in it...so I will trust and be grateful...and when weak grumbly, but still so grateful that if working is what is in the cards for me...I have the blessing of still being a mommy to my children at home...and hopefully to the children beyond my walls, and their children. I am grateful for a home that I can afford and that offers shelter to many. I am grateful for a big room that can hold lots for dinner...I am grateful for prayer...and a knowledge of the true scope of this experience.

I want to be all that I came to be...Please be patient as I work through this new challenge...

Please know I can be a slow learner

Please do not worry about tears or a set jaw...this is part of the process to learn how to be honest with emotions and still being kind and loving...when I get it done...what a gift that knowlege will be.. in the mean time there may be a few messes, and I am beginning to realize that there may be some losses.

Thanks to all who love and support me...if you are reading this...you are one of them

Love to all

My thought for the day is a bit longer..I love the last stanza

Whose woods these are I think I know. His house is in the village, though; He will not see me stopping here To watch his woods fill up with snow.
My little horse must think it queer To stop without a farmhouse near Between the woods and frozen lake The darkest evening of the year.
He gives his harness bells a shake To ask if there's some mistake. The only other sound's the sweep Of easy wind and downy flake.
The woods are lovely, dark and deep, But I have promises to keep, And miles to go before I sleep, And miles to go before I sleep

This Weekend Tournament Schedule

Kirsten is playing a softball tournament this weekend in St George February 22 and 23

Her first game will be at the canyons field 4 at 530

all are welcome to attend

This is a good one

“Look at what you've got and make the best of it. It is better to light a candle than to curse the darkness.”

For today

“I will offer a choice, not an echo.”

Barry Goldwater

Thought for Today

“The last of the human freedoms is to choose one's attitudes.”
—Victor Frank

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RYAN

10 good things about Ryan

Ryan is loving

Ryan is generous

Ryan is funny

Ryan is intelligent

Ryan is sensitive

Ryan is concerned

Ryan is loyal

Ryan is supportive

Ryan is tenacious

Ryan is resourceful

I am especially sad to be away from Ryan today...

It is the first birthday I will not be there to make a cake and sing to him and give him a hug...I miss him. Have a wonderful birthday Ryan...

Ryan was induced to avoid a birth on the holiday...and that was a blessing.

Ryan's Birth Story (usually told, but now it will be here for you when I am gone Ryan :))

I went to the hospital and was induced about 11:00 in the morning...I met my Dr there, he was retiring and Ryan was the last baby he ever delivered. I instructed the nurse's not to give me any pain medication when I asked...cause it would be too late, and to ignore me. They smiled. Bill left to get some lunch as the drugs seemed to be taking longer this time...of course minutes after he left the labor kicked into high gear, I was demanding medication, and since the labor was so early on, and I was the only one there...they gave me a big shot...just like I told them not to...

The baby crowned and they rushed me to delivery and paged for Bill to come back...and for my doctor...they told me not to push...I tried...but I was on drugs now and could not remember what anyone was saying to me for more than a few seconds...The Dr and Bill arrived at the same time both looking winded and worried. Ryan appeared a few minutes later, born less than two hours after the induction started...he was in a hurry to get here...he was pink and healthy...with apgar scores of 10 and 10. Dr. O'Heany asked me if I had smoked..as the placenta was very small and damaged...I thought he was a nut...but I couldnt think I was on drugs, so didnt discuss it as I should have. All appeared fine. Bill went off to the nursery with Ryan and I was wheeled to recovery. There was another new mom in the room with me...they handed me a buzzer and turned the lights down and left...I was so out of it...I could not think and focus on anything. I started to bleed, and I noticed that it was heavy, but could not remember long enough to push the button to get help...each time I saw the blood on the floor I would try to puch the button but lost the thought...thank goodness the woman in the room with me finally noticed...by that time there was blood all the way out to the hall. The nurses and a doctor rushed in and thank goodness I had the pain meds for the next event...lots of tummy kneading...I thought I delivered another baby in there...really...but it was just huge blood clots...I was held longer in recovery because of the incident...and was not allowed to get up and walk at all. When I got upstairs to where Ryan was, it had been a few hours. Bill had gone home and I was alone in my room, finally feeling a little sharper as the medication was wearing off. My good friend and pediatrician, Dr. Dias, came into the room and asked where Bill was...I said he had gone home...he looked concerned, he said he was sorry but there was not time to wait for him to get there he needed signatures right away, he explained to me that Ryan was very sick and was concerned he would not make it through the night...they needed to do tests and he had already done them and needed me to sign for permission. I was shocked and scared...and signed quickly...he apologized and said he would call BIll and rushed out of the room to tend to Ryan...which was what I wanted...but I remember a cold cloud of fear filling that room as I was all alone and had barely even seen this baby that was now in peril...I was not allowed to go to him, I could not get out of bed...I was so frightened. I did call my home, and spoke to my sister-in-law who was there watching my boys, she said that Bill was on his way back to the hospital, I then called my parents, as they lived in the same community, they had been aware that Ryan had arrived, but of course had no idea of the current circumstances. I spoke with my father and told him that the baby was sick and I needed him to come and give him a blessing. He told me he would come. While my dad was on his way, Dr. Dias returned to the room and told me that I was going to be working with a neovatal specialist...he told me he was the very best, and that he was very rude and arrogant, and I was going to tolerate him as he was going to be the one to help Ryan...I nodded, and worried. He brought the Dr in the room and he immediately was yelling at the nurses that my room was not acceptable...there was a huge heating unit making a racket outside the window...he insisted that they move me into a new room, and then he got down to the busincess of talking about Ryan...he told me he had diagnosed him with Septsis and that he was on a very strong dose of antibiotics. He had done a spinal tap, a kidney punch, and a variety of other tests on my new son, I asked if he had felt any of that, and they said new babies dont feel, and I remember thinking that sounded stupid...they cry when they are cold or when you bump them...they must feel pain...I was crushed that this tiny boy had to do that all alone without me...I cry about it still to think how he must have felt about the world he had entered. I imagine that angels attended him, since his mom was locked in her bed. They had no idea how long he would be sickm they had no real information but we were waiting and hoping. My father arrived with his home teacher was introduced to the Dr. He told the Dr that they were there to administer a religious healing ceremony....so the Dr agreed to allow them in the neo natal nursery, and he allowed me to go by wheelchair to look on. My son did not look like he belonged in that nursery, all these tiny 1 pound babies made him look like a giant at 9 pounds 4 ozs, he seemed healthy from where I looked on, the only sign of a problem was all the wires hanging from the top of the isolette connecting to his head arms and legs...my father gave him a blessing and wheeled me back to my new quieter room. My dad had to leave, and I was alone again with my thoughts. Bill arrived soon after. We were invited to go to the neo natal nursery then...I was afraid to see Ryan again...afraid he was going to leave and I could not bear the thought of that loss...that rough mean doctor I had been warned about, knelt down by my bed and talked to me, he wheeled me back to see Ryan...he allowed me into the nursery and I put my hands through the holes and touched my baby...my son. I cried then...He was in critical condition but was stable and did seem fine laying there. Bill had to go back to the house, I think his sister had to leave, and I remember him wanting to take me back to my room...and me not wanting to leave that spot, thinking if i did he may not be there when I got back. He insisted that I go and rest. Over the next 24 hours I snuck back to that nursery often...the next evening Branden and Sean came to visit at the hospital. Sean and Branden saw me in the wheelchair...Sean crawled up in my lap....teary...and Branden held my hand...it never had occured to me that they would be frightened by that chair...and in the moment it still didnt register...we went to the window to look in on Ryan...Branden started sobbing...and ran down the hall, once he was retrieved I sat him on my lap and asked what was wrong...he said "My baby is a puppet." I didnt understand, then realized all the tubes and wires were very scary and I was not walking...my two boys were very concerned....that could have been handled better, I left Ryan to go to the room and read with my big boys a bit. When Bill took them home I went back to the neo natal nursery, and the nurse told me that Ryan was doing really well...better than expected. My OB came to see if I wanted discharged and I said no...he. somehow, made arrangements to keep me there with Ryan one more day. The specialist came in and was also amazed at Ryan's progress...things were looking up. I stayed with Ryan and watched him sleep...a perfect looking boy fighting for his chance to be here. I stayed there through the next day...and then had to leave the hospital without my baby...I was crestfallen. That is the only time I have not brought my baby home with me. I went and spent the whole next day on that metal stool...my sister Jennifer watched my boys for me. The Dr came in and saw me there again...he spoke with me. Ryan had had a remarkable recovery, and he was going to let me take him home the next day if all went well that day...he teased that I needed to have him home so I would go back there too...I did go home and put my boys to bed and then I rested through the night...anxiously awaiting brining Ryan home...Bill drove us over in the morning and we brought our miricale baby home...he was expected to be in the hospital for weeks and he was there only days...the medical community was happily baffled...I remember thinking about that blessing...and realizing I was not baffled...I had been blessed to have Ryan with me...and Ryan blessed to have his time here...and that was from a source far beyond the medical realm...I am grateful again today for God's blessings and his hand in our lives...

Happy Birthday Ryan!

For Monday

It is our choices that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.”
—J.K. Rowling (b. 1965), novelist

Sunday"s Quote

'We cannot become what we need to be by remaining what we are.' (Max Dupree)

Today's thought

Our birth is but a sleep and a forgetting:The Soul that rises with us, our life’s Star,Hath had elsewhere its setting,And cometh from afar:Not in entire forgetfulness,And not in utter nakedness,But trailing clouds of glory do we comeFrom God, who is our home:Heaven lies about us in our infancy!
-William Woodsworth

Blessings

I Have been Blessed with many

A friend is a person whom you want to have near when you are dying. And whom you like to be with while you are living; To whom you spontaneously turn for help when you are in trouble. And who is the first to hear the good news when you have good fortune; Whose counsel you seek when you are perplexed. And whose congratulations you welcome when the perplexity is solved; In whom you can confide the secret you want no other living soul to know. Yet will never pry into your heart to discover whether there are any more secrets to be revealed; On whom you can lean when your heart aches. But who will never take advantage of your leaning; Who will get down on his knees beside you when you are down. And forget that he did so when you are on your feet again; And whose shoulder you can weep on when you are sad. And with whom you enjoy laughing when you are glad;Who has a tear on his cheek when you suffer. And a twinkle in his eye when the sun shines on you again; Who has pain in his tone when you are in distress. And melody in his voice when your heart is gay; Who admires you for your strong points. But loves you in spite of your weak ones; Who can laugh at your foibles. Without despising you for having them; Who makes allowance for your limitations. Without allowing them to obscure your talents; Who is proud of you when fortune favors you. But not ashamed of you when you fail; Who contributes to your success without claiming any share in it. Who can feel and show satisfaction when you please him. But never resentment when you disappoint him; Who will tell you the truth even when it hurts. And to whom you can tell the truth without his taking offense; Who is not ashamed to ask you a favor even at the risk of being imposed upon. Who can extend a helping hand and lighten your load Without expecting any other reward than having had the privilege of so doing; Who gives all he can whenever he can. Without ever keeping a record of what he has given; Who says the best about you when everybody else is saying the worst. Any person needs at least four such friends; Every person owes it to himself to be such a friend to at least four fellow humans.
God help me to be such a friend.

For today

“When our eyes see our hands doing the work of our hearts, the circle of creation is completed inside us, the doors of our souls fly open and love steps forth to heal everything in sight.”

Monday

"How far you go in life depends on you being tender with the young, compassionate with the aged, sympathetic with the striving and tolerant of the weak and strong. Because someday in life you will have been all of these". George Washington Carver

Sunday's Quote on Saturday

Problems do not go away. They must be worked through or else they remain, forever a barrier to the growth and development of the spirit. M. Scott Peck, M.D.

My good friend lost her son on Wednesday...he was 32 years old. We never think that it is the last time we will see our child, our brother, our friend...sometimes it is. It has been a great reminder that we do not know our time here at school and each of us has a different assignment.

Justin Hayes Olsen left this world to the next in his sleep February 6, 2008. He was born December 19, 1975. He lived most of his life in Utah County, principally Spanish Fork. Hayes felt poorly the night before and went to bed early. No one had a clue of anything seriously wrong.
Hayes truly loved his family. He was very patient with his kids, showing them maximum love in a kindly way even when disciplining them. Hayes loved to give his wife and kids presents. He lived for the moment and enjoyed life fully without worrying too much about the future. He always had a ready engaging smile and a big bear hug for everyone. Hayes was friendly to a fault. He would loan or give away anything he had to anyone who expressed a need. Hayes really loved people. We wish he would just wake up and let us finish our association with him. He was only 32 years old.
He is survived by his wife Sandra Sophia Irvine Olsen and his three children, Gage, Skylinn, and Anson; and by his parents, Clark and Marti Olsen, and five siblings, Tyler Olsen, Cheyenne Nilsson, Alden Olsen, Lance Olsen, and C.J. Olsen. In lieu of flowers, please make any contribution to the special children’s account set up at Mountain America Credit Union in behalf of the Olsen children..
Funeral services will be held on Monday, February 11, 2008 at 11:00 a.m. in the LDS Chapel located at 4th North and 5th West in Spanish Fork, Utah. Family and friends may call on Sunday evening, February 10, 2008 at Walker Mortuary, 187 South Main Street, from 6:00-8:00 p.m. or on Monday morning from 9:45-10:45 a.m. at the church prior to services. Interment will be at the Spanish Fork City Cemetery

Quote for Saturday

Ecclesiastes 9:11, "I returned, and saw under the sun, that the race is not to the swift, nor the battle to the strong, neither yet bread to the wise, nor yet riches to men of understanding, nor yet favour to men of skill; but time and chance happeneth to them all."

Quote for the day

"Sticks in a bundle are unbreakable"-Kenyan Proverb

For Today

There's A Hole In My Sidewalk
Chapter One
I walk down a street and there's a big hole. I don't see it and fall into it. It's dark and hopeless and it takes me a long time to find my way out. It's not my fault !
Chapter Two
I walk down the same street. There's a big hole and I can see it, but I still fall in. It's dark and hopeless and it takes me a long time to get out. It's still not my fault.
Chapter Three
I walk down a street. There's a big hole. I can see it, but I still fall in. It's become a habit. But I keep my eyes open and get out immediately. It is my fault.
Chapter Four
I walk down a street. There's a big hole. And I walk around it.
Chapter Five
I walk down a different street.